10 Mins of Ass-Kicking!

As some of you may remember, I herniated a disc in my back last summer. No, it wasn’t caused by an accident, but my crying son who refused to let anybody else carry him. Having experienced a pain that actually exceeds that of child-birth I have been actively trying to avoid going through it again. Unlike the pain of child-birth which women seem to gleefully pursue again and again defying all logic. Avoiding back pain means two things; 1. don’t lift anything heavy and 2. exercise your abdominals.

I was born with no abdominal muscles. As a matter of fact I come from a long line of women lacking abdominal muscles. My family tree hasn’t included six-pack abs since before the birth of Jesus. The thought of somehow magically creating abdominal muscles by doing hundreds of crunches a day is unrealistic – especially when you consider that there are Survivor episodes to watch, chocolate Easter bunnies to eat and a new American Idol in the process of being selected. C’mon people, I’m only human!!

My friend Laura, recognizing my plight recommended a series of exercise DVD’s called 10-Minute workouts. Yesterday I received my Pilates and Fitness Ball 10-minute DVD’s in the mail. I was giddy with excitement. The hope of having muscle definition in 10-simple minutes seemed like a dream come true. I dreamed of swimsuit season as the DVD player whirred into action.

10 minutes later I was slumped over my fitness ball begging for mercy from the perky and energetic instructor on the tv who exclaimed “You Did Great! Let’s do the next circuit!” How is that possible? I don’t think I could even move my toe and she’s smiling and perky like she just had her toes painted. Did you know there is an actual muscle that is near your belly-button? Well there is and mine hurts like hell.

Don’t be fooled though – I have not given up. I will not be beaten by Perky Patty and her large beach ball!!

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